mad miracles
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engracia
Shizumori Rin 静森・琳
an expert otaku
procrastinates on an hourly basis.
extremely boring and moody.
has dark and angsty thoughts about murdering the world.
lives, breathes, eats anything related to fashion.
music anchors her to sanity.
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Sunday, June 21, 2009, 6:49 AM
at crossroads.
x-posted to my LJthere are so many things i want to do.
sewing, designing clothes makes me happy, even though right now, i suck at drafting patterns and drawing out the designs i want.
looking at pretty clothes on magazines and lookbook makes me really happy too.
but, could this be just another phase?
do i really know what i want?
while reading parakiss (hahaha of all the things i should be doing now), i had an epiphany.
sometimes, what you want isn't what you'll get.
if i successfully make it into fashion school, filled with hopes and ideals, chances are that i'll still end up having to compromise.
will i ever learn how to?
and even if i do make it into the school, will i adapt? is it really what i want? am i ready to move away from the status quo?
F, T, AJ came to my house today.
F said something about me gaining freedom in 5 months' time.
perhaps i should just complete my As, then go try for fashion school?
or should i just leave now and try to build up my portfolio, which could significantly improve my chances of getting in?
i realise i'm pretty much rambling.
oh wells.
school tmr.
i'm going to ask about the procedures for withdrawal from exams.
wish me luck.